News4U Online

Reality can sometimes be stranger than fiction, and our newspapers, magazines, and the Internet are chock full of stories that, although deserving of more attention, never quite make the nightly news. Here are some of those stories, along with my unsolicited, often cynical commentary. This is the Weird News from Around the World.

Concrete Falls From Sky

uk.reuters.com

Reuters in the UK reported in June of a Russian Air Force plane dropping a 55 lb. bag of cement through a Moscow resident’s roof in a botched attempt to seed clouds for weather control around the Russian capital. The cement, which was supposed to have pulverized midair into powder, along with a mix of silver iodide and liquid nitrogen to produce rain clouds, “fell on the roof of a house, making a hole about 80-100 cm (2.5-3 ft),” police in Naro-Fominsk said. The home owner refused an offer of 50,000 rubles ($2,100) from the air force and is suing for moral suffering.

The use of “cloud seeding” as a means to control weather has been well documented. U.S. forces used the technique to slow the movement of enemy troops and arms along the Ho Chi Minh trail during the Vietnam War. The U.N. subsequently adopted a Weather Weapon Treaty in 1976, banning the further use of weather manipulation as a weapon. There are, however, no international agreements banning the peacetime use of weather manipulation.

My take on this: God doesn’t play dice with the Universe, and neither should we. There are some realms into which human beings are, frankly, too stupid and irresponsible to venture. Take it from Dr. Frankenstein. High up on the list of no-nos, right beside genetically engineered goats that give out spider silk instead of milk for more efficient manufacture of Army flak jackets (true story), attempting to control the weather is one of them.

For more fascinating (and sometimes scary) reading on the modern technologies and ethical dilemmas surrounding human weather manipulation, search the Internet for “HAARP (High-frequency Active Auroral Research Program)” and read the controversy surrounding the government funded program located in the Alaskan wilderness reputed to have weather control capabilities.

Praying at the Pump

www.washingtonpost.com

The Washington Post did a story recently about a group of “faith activists” who surrounded a D.C. area Shell station and prayed for divine intervention in the price of gasoline. “I think through this crisis, God is trying to call us back to depend on Him more,” one in the group was quoted as saying. Later, the article reported, the group locked hands and sang a rendition of the song “We Shall Overcome” with the added line “We'll have lower gas prices.”

            My opinions are varied on this one. First, I’ll disclaim that I consider myself a Christian. And while I recognize the power of prayer to do some amazing things, like aid the human body in healing through improved outlook and to provide a level of psychological comfort in what can, at times, seem like a cruel and unfeeling Universe, anyone who thinks God has much interest in their day to day accounting activities is just plain deluded, in my humble opinion. In fact, it was Jesus who said, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.” (Matthew 19:24) So, God, it might appear, has more interest in seeing you fail financially than succeed, and, he might even say, it’s for your own good.

Assuming you still want to avoid Jesus’ brand of worldly poverty and self-sacrifice, how about instead of petitioning the Lord for lower prices at the pump, petition your government to stop the Federal Reserve’s inflation of your dollar! It can’t have any worse results than prayer. The national average price of gasoline has increased almost $0.50 per gallon since the “pray at the pump” activists began their crusade.

Is McDonalds Outsourcing Your McNugget Order?

www.kitv.com/money/16607424/detail.htm

KITV in Honolulu has reported that more than half the McDonalds restaurants in Hawaii now use workers in another state to take drive-thru orders. Called “remote order takers” by McDonalds insiders, the system is designed, they claim, to enhance to the speed and accuracy of order-taking.

            I can’t help but be skeptical of this explanation by the McXecutives. How could remotely taking an order from a call center in Texas for a Big Mac and fries in Hawaii and then beaming the order back to the Hawaii location via an internet connection possibly be more efficient? I will commend McDonalds, though. They could have outsourced the jobs to another country altogether. Then, not only could our general computer-related questions get lost in translation, but also our drive-thru orders could be more torturous than the current intercoms that sound like Charlie Brown’s parents.

Man Wanted By FBI Gets $80M Government Contract

abcnews.go.com/Blotter/story?id=4996285&page=1

Gaith Pharaon, a Saudi businessman wanted by the FBI in connection with his alleged role in the BCCI and CenTrust savings and loan scandals, just got his company Attock Refinery Ltd an $80 million contract to supply U.S. forces in Afghanistan with fuel. Interestingly, Pharoan was also one of the investors in George W. Bush’s first business venture, Arbusto Energy, along with Osama Bin Laden’s half brother, Salem. No, I’m not joking. I can almost hear Kevin Bacon singing, “It’s a Small World After All,” with Mickey, Goofy and the gang.

So, I’m thinking of knocking over a liquor store and applying for a government grant or something. Think it will improve my chances? …or do these advantages come only with the commission of more serious crimes like bank fraud or high treason? Whatever it is, show me which box to tick; baby needs a new pair of sneakers.